Last week, a friend from college lost her son. He had a complicated medical diagnosis and for the past five years, I have watched his family care for and celebrate him. My friend shared his life in a Facebook group, so I was able to watch them celebrate milestones like learning to play with toys, getting teeth, having a 5th birthday, and going to preschool. I watched and celebrated each little moment with his family and praised God that they were given that experience to treasure. This past weekend, his fight and struggle finished and he’s whole and healed in heaven. Over the years, my friend has shown grace and perseverance, and amazing love. She has inspired me and hundreds of others with her constant and humble care. What a privilege to know such a person.
I was reminded again, over this weekend, why I never say I’m sad my kids are getting older. When my kids reach a milestone I chose not to be sad about it, in our house we’ve always celebrated aging. My kids have grown and matured and learned the way children were created to. When my youngest moved from the nursery into the toddler class, we celebrated not having any babies in the nursery class. I know moms that never moved their baby out of the nursery. When my last baby finished nursing, I rejoiced that she could eat food. I know moms that will always feed their children through a tube or bottle. When my oldest went to school I was so excited for him to be able to go to school. I know moms that don’t get to send their children to school. As a family, we have prayed for babies that didn’t live to their first birthday. We’ve prayed for children that have horrific accidents and haven’t fully recovered yet (we’re still praying for those miracles!). We’ve prayed for parents caring for adult children as they suffer from terrible diseases and fight for their life.
I say all of this not to make you feel bad if you miss the baby stage of your motherhood or any stage from years past. I say this to challenge you, like I’ve been challenged this weekend, to praise Jesus for each and every day. If you’re a mother, praise Jesus for the gift of your children, and the normal things they get to do. Don’t waste these precious moments being sad that they are fleeting. Lean in and enjoy each moment, pay attention to them. Cherish the normal things you get to do and pray for a heart that remembers them.
I’ve been thinking about Psalm 90:12. Teach us to number our days. Oh, that we would live from this mindset. That our days are numbered and we are finite. Living like this will give us a heart of wisdom. I pray that I am a mom with a wise heart. That I know my days are numbered and the days of everyone in my family are numbered. I pray that I won’t live out of fear or anxiety, but trust and urgency to cherish what I’ve been given. To praise God for his beautiful gifts in my life and to celebrate them. And never ever forget the truth of Psalm 90:12
I want to share a resource with you. I came across this company a couple years ago and I haven’t seen anything like it since. The company is called Bottle of Tears and you can find it here. They are “curated gifts of hope” for those wanting to do something for our dear friends that are grieving. “When you don’t have the words to say, this makes a perfect tangible gift to show someone Jesus sees them and hasn’t forgotten them.” They sell jewelry, home decor, prints, gift bundles, and even a book. If you are looking for a bereavement gift, this is a great option. Check it all out here.
Let’s cherish our days, knowing they are numbered. And let us hold close those who grieve, reminding them that God is good and God loves them.
Abigail Denton 